Statistically, you’ll fail. But not today. Today you’re a unicorn, baby. The sticker that says, “We’re disrupting vibes and burning cash responsibly.” Perfect for anyone who’s pivoted five times and calls it agile methodology.

Specs

• 3x3" square, for square metrics like ARR
• High-quality vinyl that outlasts your runway
• Guaranteed +10 Charisma when pitching on caffeine and delusion